Publicly, I do stuff, organise things, speak out against injustices, make a fuss. I think I come across as committed, passionate, determined, enthusiastic, irreverent and subversive. Hope so, anyway. That's not the whole picture though. In private, I spend a lot of time worrying about not doing enough, about what I should be doing and whether any of it makes any difference. I get despondent about all the violence and bloodshed in the world; about the way we put profit before people and planet; about the lifestyle we enjoy here thanks to the desperate suffering of our fellow human beings elsewhere; about our disregard for human rights and animal rights.

I love being with like-minded people, one or two at a time. I'm not good at small talk and I don't like big groups. I'm not naturally very sociable. The thing people most often seem to get wrong about me is thinking I'm brave. I'm not brave at all. I only do whatever I do because not doing it feels like a much more difficult option.

I try not to live in 'bad faith', by which I mean that I try to take responsibility for my actions, for the choices I make, and that I see myself as an actor in the world rather than a victim of circumstance. We are all constrained, or limited, by circumstances that are outside our control, but within those limits we are completely free to act, or not to act, in whatever way we see fit. This freedom gives us choices, and a lot of responsibility. It's all a bit scary really.

I think work is a dirty word. What annoys me most is when I'm out protesting or demonstrating and someone drives past and shouts out "Get a job!" Shouting back that "I've already got one, thanks!" isn't the right answer at all, and betrays all those people who don't have paid jobs but who devote time and energy to doing good things in their communities for free. I hate that we live in a society where we are only valued for the paid work we do. Never mind if we make parts for guns and bombs which kill and maim; never mind if we sell people stuff they neither need nor can afford; never mind if our work is unethical and unecological. The important thing is that we pay our taxes and don't have time to think too much. It's a result of our exchange system - more on this below - that the things we contribute for free and with love are not valued, and are invisible in our money-oriented world. I have always tried to find paid work which is socially useful, or at least not too damaging, and part time - just enough to pay the bills. In my free time, I do things for free.

In the past year, I've spent a lot of time working on a gift economy project - Freeconomy Wrexham. On the face of it, this is simply a re-use project to keep useful stuff out of landfill and in the local community. At least as important, however, is how the project operates. Freeconomy Wrexham runs 'Bring and Take Free for All' events in the community - these are essentially bring and buys with no buying, and where bringing isn't obligatory or even expected! Freeconomy challenges the notion of 'fair exchange' (which is in any case an oxymoron). The problem with any exchange/money/trading system is that those with very little to barter with cannot expect to have even their most essential needs - for food, water, warmth, clothing, shelter - met, even though these are basic human rights. In most exchange/trading economies, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. There are still lots of free gifts going into an exchange system (working for less than the value of a job, for instance, or nurturing children free of charge) but ultimately these efforts contribute to growing inequalities. In a gift economy, there is no notion of exchange. If you need something, you should have it, and someone will be glad to give it to you. Wealth flows in the other direction, towards a more equal sharing of our resources and, contrary to most people's expectations, there is plenty for everyone and goodwill in abundance. Bring and Take events demonstrate this in a practical way, and organising them has been a wonderful, positive experience, a revelation in fact. It's also been a powerful antidote to the negative effects of campaigning against things, which is what I've been doing for years. I'd recommend it to anyone.

I'm influenced by all sorts of things and people. I don't have heroes, although there are many people who I admire and respect for various reasons. I think we all have lots to learn from each other, and having a few people on pedestals just encourages the masses to apathy and inaction. That's why I'm attracted to non-hierarchical or 'horizontal' organising, to decision-making by consensus, to anarchy.

The future of the world is insects, of course... but in the meantime, I guess it's our children.

My photos can be found here

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